Friday, December 14, 2012

THE BIRTH OF A HOUSE......AND THE DEATH OF A MOOSE.

THE HOUSE IF FINALLY ON THE MARKET!!!
THE BAD PART.....
NOBODY IS COMING TO SEE IT :(
WELL....NOT TRUE....THREE PEOPLE HAVE LOOKED AT IT
IN A MONTH.....
IT SEEMS REALTORS NO LONGER DO BROKER WALK THRU'S.....
NO OPEN HOUSES....
NO FLYERS...
BASICALLY THEY DO NOTHING AND GET PAID 6% IF IT JUST
HAPPENS TO SELL....
OH EXCUSE ME........THEY LIST IT ON THE INTERNET...
REMEMBER IN MY LAST POST ABOUT THE HOUSE I MENTIONED
THAT I ASKED FOR A THREE COLOR COLOR THEME
KEEPING THE HOUSE A DARK BROWN...
SAGE GREEN SHUTTERS...
CREAM TRIM AROUND THE WINDOWS AND A CREAM
FRONT DOOR.....
BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.......
THE REALTOR.....A MAN....AND THE CONTRACTOR....HIS FATHER....
VETOED THAT IDEA AND SAID ONLY TWO COLORS
WOULD BE MORE "BUYER FRIENDLY"
WHEN IT WAS DONE AND I STEPPED BACK TO TAKE A LOOK
ALL I SAW WAS DARK AND BLAH......
NO PERSONALITY....

ONE COMMENT FROM A WOMEN REALTOR....
"HOUSE LOOKS TOO DARK...NO CURB APPEAL....BUYER DIDN'T EVEN
WANT TO GO INSIDE...."
SO MUCH FOR MEN THINKING THEY HAVE AN EYE FOR THESE THINGS...
LET'S ALSO DISCUSS HIS LACK OF PICTURES OF THE HOUSE
ON REALTOR.COM
I WENT AND TOOK ALL THE BELOW PICTURES AND HE
SAID.....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
NOT APPROPRIATE...DON'T WANT TO SHOW TOO MUCH...
WANT TO KEEP THE BUYER GUESSING UNTIL THEY GET INSIDE....
OUR DECK.....
I WAS GOING FOR THE VIEW....THE PRIVACY.....HE COMPLAINED
ABOUT THE LEAVES.....
SO THEN TELL ME TO RACK THE LEAVES AND RE-TAKE THE SHOT....
LET THE BUYER SEE THE PRIVACY....AND WE GET
KILLER SUNSETS....
AT 1900 SQ. FEET....MY CAMERA LENS CAN SHOW THE WHOLE
ROOM FROM ONE SPOT...
THIS IS THE GREAT ROOM WHEN YOU ENTER THE HOUSE...
WE INSTALLED WOOD FLOORS....NEW CEILINGS....
THE CEILING IS TWO STORIES HIGH....
OKAY SO I ADMIT ALL THE WALLS ARE CURVED.....
BUT YOU CAN SEE THE SIZE OF THE ROOM..
SURELY PEOPLE AREN'T THAT STUPID TO THINK THE WALLS
ARE CURVED....
THESE WERE TAKE WITH A FISHEYE LENS....
LOOKING INTO THE DINING ROOM FROM THE GREAT ROOM
LARGE ENOUGH TO FIT A TABLE FOR 12......
LOOKING FROM THE DR...... THE GREAT ROOM ON THE RIGHT
AND THE KITCHEN ON THE LEFT...STAIRS TO SECOND FLOOR...
WET BAR.....TO SEPARATE THE DINING ROOM FROM THE
KITCHEN....
SECOND FLOOR BALCONY
OVERLOOKING THE GREAT ROOM....
THE BELOVED MOOSE HEAD USED TO HANG ON THAT STONE
WALL....THE VERMONT CASTING STOVE CAN HEAT THE
WHOLE HOUSE...
MOOSE STORY TO FOLLOW....
ONE OF FOUR BEDROOMS....
SMALL BEDROOM BUT SO CUTE FOR A CHILD'S ROOM...
CRAFTS ROOM....OFFICE....
SKYLIGHT MAKES IT NICE AND BRIGHT...
ALL THE SECOND FLOOR BEDROOMS HAVE SKYLIGHTS...
MASTER ON MAIN WITH A LOVELY BIG BAY WINDOW....
KITCHEN WAS COMPLETELY RE-MODELED....
HALLWAY LEADS BACK TO GREAT ROOM.
PANTRY WITH 10 LIGHT DOOR IS GREAT FOR  DISHES...AND STUFF.
LOOKING BACK INTO THE DINING ROOM....
DECK IS OFF OF THIS ROOM...
LARGE ENOUGH TO EAT IN.....OR TO BOWL.....
SO THAT'S THE FINISHED PROJECT....
I HAVE NO IDEA WHO HAS COME TO SEE IT....BUT THE "ANONYMOUS"
FEEDBACK
STATES THE PEOPLE DON'T LIKE THE HOUSE...
BUT WHEN ASKED ABOUT THE EXTERIOR AND INTERIOR THEY
COMMENTED THAT IT'S "EXCELLENT''
GO FIGURE....

HOUSE WAS LISTED AT $159,900.
AFTER ONE WEEK THE REALTOR CALLED AND SAID IT NEEDED TO BE
REDUCED.....SO IT'S NOW $155,000.
HE CLAIMED WE WOULD GET MORE TRAFFIC IF WE DID THIS.....
THE ONLY TRAFFIC WE ARE GETTING IS OUR OWN....
WE GO OVER ONCE A WEEK TO MAKE SURE IT'S STILL STANDING....
HE CALLED THE OTHER MORNING TO SAY THAT WE SOUND LIKE WE ARE
ANXIOUS TO SELL THE HOUSE AND WANTED TO KNOW IF IT'S BECAUSE OF THE
FISCAL CLIFF....HE COULD ALWAYS REDUCE THE PRICE AGAIN....
LET'S TRY DOING A LITTLE WORK FOR YOUR COMMISSION....
HOW DOES THAT SOUND....

NOW FOR THE SECOND HALF OF THE STORY....
THE BOSS KILLED MY MOOSE....
AND IT WAS ALL BECAUSE OF THE REALTOR'S FATHER....
CAN YOU HEAR HOSTILITY I MY VOICE.....
I HAVE GROWN TO HATE BOTH OF THESE MEN...
I WASN'T ABLE TO RETRIEVE A PICTURE OF MARTY THE MOOSE
IN ONE PIECE.....BUT I HAVE OWNED HIM 20 YEARS....
HE IS FROM 1912....
WEIGHS A TON SINCE HIS SCULL IS STILL INSIDE THAT HEAD...
AND SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL....
HE HAS BEEN WAITING PATIENTLY OVER AT THE OTHER HOUSE
FOR THE PAST 15 MONTHS .....AND HE HASN'T COMPLAINED ONCE...
HE WAS SUPPOSE TO HANG WITH THE OTHER GUYS....
THE TWO DEER AND THE AMERICAN BUFFALO
BUT HIS WAS TO BE A SPOT OF HONOR...
HIGH UP ON MY ENTRANCE FOYER WALL....
WHEN THE CONTRACTOR.....LET ME REPEAT HE IS THE REALTOR'S
FATHER.....
WENT OVER BUDGET AND DIDN'T INFORM THE BOSS AT THE TIME...
THE BOSS BARGAINED THE FINAL PAYMENT BY
SAYING HE WOULD PAY HIS PRICE BUT "SAID CONTRACTOR"
HAD TO ARRANGE TO HAVE MARTY HUNG....
THE DAY OF THE HANGING.....HE WAS VACUMED....HIS ANTLERS
WERE LEMON PLEDGED....I WAS SO EXCITED....
SHOULD BE NO PROBLEM......AFTER ALL HE MANAGED TO HAVE ALL OUR
CEILINGS SCRAPED AND RE-DRYWALLED AT THE OTHER HOUSE....
SURELY HE WILL GET THE SAME MEN TO HANG THIS THING...

THE CONTRACTOR IS 74 YEARS OLD....
HE SHOWS UP WITH A SHORT LADDER AND HIS NEPHEW ASSISTANT
WHO BY ALL ACCOUNTS HAS AN I.Q. OF 73.......
AFTER ABOUT A HALF HOUR OF LOOKING BUSY.....HE ANNOUNCED
IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO DO....
"TOO DANGEROUS...."
NOW HE ALREADY HAS A HUGE HOOK INSTALLED IN MY WALL ABOUT
12 FEET OFF THE FLOOR.....
HE SAYS IT'S ONLY THE SECOND TIME IN HIS WORKING CAREER THAT HE
WAS UNABLE TO DO SOMETHING HE THOUGHT HE COULD DO...
AND HE TAKES HIS LADDER AND WALKS OUT.....

PHONE CALL IS MADE TO THE BOSS WHO IS AT THE OTHER HOUSE WAITING
FOR HOME DEPOT TO DELIVER THE NEW STOVE....
YOU KNOW THE STOVE THAT WE HAD TO BUY BECAUSE JIM THE
CONTRACTOR DAMAGED MY BEAUTIFUL STAINLESS STEEL
JENNAIR RANGE AND IT WAS UNABLE TO BE FIXED...
PLUS HIS SON THOUGHT IT WAS OLD AND" IF WE WANT TO
SELL THE HOUSE IT WOULD HAVE TO REPLACED...."

I TELL THE BOSS JIM WENT ALL SISSY ON ME AND WOULDN'T CLIMB THE
LADDER AND LEFT WITHOUT HANGING THE MOOSE....
I HANG UP THE PHONE AND BEGIN TO MAKE CALLS TO
FIND SOMEONE TO HANG IT.....

THE BOSS SHOWS UP SHORTLY AFTER IN A U-HAUL TRUCK
COMPLETE WITH SCAFFOLDING...
YES THAT'S RIGHT.....HE'S GOING TO HANG IT HIMSELF.....
BECAUSE IF ANYONE CAN DO IT......IT'S THE BOSS....
AFTER MUCH CURSING AND YELLING WHEN I MOVED THE PLATFORM
AT HIS INSTRUCTIONS AND THE WHEELS FELL OFF...


HE LIFTS UP MARTY......AGAIN MARTY PROBABLY WEIGHS 65-75 POUNDS...
HE CLIMBS A FEW STEPS TO LIFT MARTY UP ONTO THE PLATFORM...
MARTY MAKES IT ONTO THE PLATFORM....
AND THEN SOMETHING WENT TERRIBLY WRONG....
WITH A BEET RED FACE AND BULGING CAROTID ARTERY
THAT WOULD BE ON THE BOSS NOT ON THE MOOSE...
THE BOSS LOSES HIS GRIP AND MARTY TAKES A DIVE HEAD FIRST
OFF THE PLATFORM......HITTING THE BANISTER ON THE WAY DOWN...
TAKING OUT A NICE SIZE CHUNK...

AND HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS SNOUT....
TOTALLY DAMAGED TO HUGE PROPORTIONS....
AFTER ALL HE'S 100 YEARS OLD....
ALL BECAUSE JIM WHO NEVER HAD ANY INTENTIONS OF HANGING
HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE......WALKED OUT AND THE BOSS
DIDN'T WANT TO DISAPPOINT ME.....
I WAS DEVASTATED....
AND THEN THOSE WORDS WERE SPOKEN THAT ONLY A MAN COULD SAY
IN SUCH A SITUATION.....

"WHY ARE YOU SO UPSET".......

BTW......

THE BOSS AFTER THE KILLING CHECKED OUT 16 POINT MOOSE HEADS
ON THE INTERNET....THEY RANGE IN PRICE FOR A NEW ONE
FROM $3500.00 TO $4,000.00....
TO WHICH HE SAID....
"IF I KNEW IT WAS WORTH THAT MUCH I NEVER WOULD
HAVE TRIED TO HANG IT MYSELF"....

Friday, November 30, 2012

CHRISTMAS AT PAPER CHASE FARM........

I ALWAYS WANTED A CHRISTMAS HOUSE....
A HOUSE THAT WAS MEANT TO BE DECORATED FOR
CHRISTMAS....
I HADN'T DECORATED IN OVER TEN YEARS SINCE WE SPENT
EVERY CHRISTMAS IN JERSEY WITH DAUGHTER AND
FAMILY....
BUT WHEN WE MOVED INTO PAPER CHASE FARM LAST YEAR
IT WAS TIME TO BREAK OUT YEARS OF PACKED
AWAY ORNAMENTS AND OTHER CHRISTMAS GOODIES...
THIS YEAR I TALKED THE BOSS INTO PUTTING UP THE TREE
IN OUR ENTRANCE HALL....
HE EVEN ADMITS THIS AREA WAS MADE FOR A
CHRISTMAS TREE...
NOTICE THE DEER.....
JUST HUNG TODAY AFTER WE HAD A MAJOR DISASTER
TRYING TO HANG MY BELOVED MOOSE HEAD....
STORY ABOUT HIS DEMISE AT ANOTHER TIME...
THE ENTRANCE TABLE.....
GREAT FRENCHY VASE FOUND AT THE
POTTERY BARN OUTLET...
PART OF MY MILK GLASS COLLECTION...
LOOKING BEAUTIFUL THIS TIME OF YEAR DECKED OUT IN
RED AND GREEN...
JUST A FEW OF MY OVER 100 PIECE COLLECTION
MY TABLE SET FOR MY BLOG LUNCH THIS COMING
MONDAY....
PICTURES TO FOLLOW OF US LADIES CELEBRATING NOT
ONLY THE HOLIDAY BUT ON BECOMING FRIENDS
THROUGH THE MIRACLE OF BLOGGING....
HINTING AT WHERE THIS FAMILY WILL BE SPENDING THE
HOLIDAYS....
OH WAIT......HOW DID MISS LIBERTY GET A SPOT OF HONOR
ON THE TABLESCAPE....
WELL....WE ARE STARTING OUT IN NYC......
FOR CHRISTMAS WITH OUR GIRLS...
AND THEN US FOUR FLY OFF TO PARIS
FOR NEW YEARS EVE....
MISS "B" IS EVEN TAKING FRENCH CLASSES SO SHE
CAN BE OUR INTERPRETER.....
THAT IS IF WE NEED TO KNOW COLORS AND NUMBERS...
AND SHE CAN INTRODUCE HERSELF IN FRENCH TOO!!
PAST YEARS ORNAMENTS FROM "MISS CHATTY CRONE"
EVERY BODY'S FAVORITE DAILY BLOGGER....
SHE WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE ON MONDAY...

POTTERY BARN FROM A PAST YEAR..... 
THE KITCHEN TABLE DECKED OUT IN
SNOWMEN....
NOT LIKELY OF ANY SNOW IN GEORGIA SO THESE
ARE THE CLOSEST WE WILL GET TO
SNOWMEN...
SOFA TABLE IN THE GREAT ROOM....
PINE CONES AND MISS LIBERTY......
MY FAVORITE BUD FROM MIDDLE SCHOOL.....SUE FROM JERSEY
JUST SENT ME THAT GREAT BLACK GLOBE.....
SHE ACTUALLY PAYS ATTENTION TO MY OBSESSIONS AND
SENDS ME WONDERFUL GOODIES ALL THE TIME....
THANK YOU SUE!!
A LITTLE WORN AROUND THE EDGES BUT
ONE OF MY FAVORITE PIECES...
ON THE COFFEE TABLE....
MORE GLOBES!
ON THE HEARTH.....
PINE CONE ANDIRONS....
NUTCRACKERS!!
AT ONE TIME I HAD ABOUT 75 NUTCRACKERS.....
AND THEN I DISCOVERED E-BAY....
 I KEPT A FEW.....SHOULD HAVE KEPT MORE...
THE FIREPLACE.....
THE BEST THING WE HAVE EVER BOUGHT....
GAS LOGS....
YES THEY DO GET HOT ENOUGH TO WARM THE ROOM....
NO CLEAN UP....NO SOOT.....ONE TURN OF THE KNOB...AND I DON'T
MISS THAT REAL FIRE SMELL....
NO BIG SCREEN FOR ME IN THIS ROOM.....I HAVE A SMALL 17"
T.V. TUNED IN TO "BRAVO" ON THE BOOKSHELVES...
THAT'S ALL I NEED....
A NICE FIRE AND THE "HOUSEWIVES"

LOOKING FROM THE FAMILY ROOM INTO THE
ENTRANCE FOYER...
 
ONE LAST LOOK AT THE TABLE IN THE
DINING ROOM....

MAYBE TWO..... 
CAN'T EXPLAIN WHY SOME THINGS LOOK CROOKED....
IT'S LIKE DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE....
IN MY CASE IT'S
DON'T EAT SPAGHETTI THEN PHOTOGRAPH....
THIS IS THE HUNT TABLE THAT THE BOSS REFUSED TO MOVE LAST YEAR
THIS USUALLY SITS WHERE THE TREE IS THIS YEAR...
I HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY LITTLE TOUR.....
I WAITED OVER 40 YEARS FOR A
"CHRISTMAS HOUSE"....
I THINK I GOT IT!!


I AM LINKING TO KIM'S 
"SAVVY SOUTHERN STYLE HOMESPUN CHRISTMAS
VIGNETTES AND MANTELS...."
APPLE IS BEING UNCOOPERATIVE IN PUTTING HER LOVELY
BUTTON ON THIS PAGE
BUT PLEASE HIT LINK BELOW TO SEE ALL THE OTHER BEAUTIFUL
BLOG POSTS....
http://www.savvysouthernstyle.net/2012/12/a-homespun-christmasvignettes-and.html